I prefer to be positive and separate the person from the behaviour, trying to understand what motivates them when it comes to seemingly unprofessional behaviour. After all, we can all resort to childishness when our hot buttons are pressed.
Dignity is important to me, as it is many people and sometimes when pointing out bad behaviour, it can seem petty or unimportant.
But it isn't.
We live in an era where many women are encouraged to come forward on domestic violence, where workers are told they should stand up to bullies at work and where globally we are trying to fight the dreadful treatment of men and women.
Years ago, women put up with sexism, flirtatious comments and derogatory remarks about a woman's role. It never bothered me and still doesn't - but many people, including the young who were encouraged (under a labour government and left wing idealogy) to think every insult is going to ruin their life and devastate their world, no longer have much of that resilience.
The left have made it their life's ambition to make people believe they are in a place of victimhood and to keep them there, because it suits their political agenda - you are weak, we the state are strong, we will protect you.
Instead they should have incorporated resilience thinking to ensure our young can meet the challenges they will surely face and to stand up to what is right, without it affecting our perception of how grateful we should be in this country.
"Both tears and sweat are salty, but they render a different result. Tears will get you sympathy; sweat will get you change."
Reverend, Jesse Jackson
Reverend, Jesse Jackson
So this does not mean that bullies and those who make such nasty remarks should get away with it. I've always confronted what I thought was out of order control-freakery, lies or downright rudeness from anyone and everyone who did it in front of me, even if I wasn't the recipient. As far as I'm concerned if you do it in my company then it IS my business. I wish more people would do the same. I speak as I find and I do not shirk from confrontation or what I call 'courageous' conversations.
The beached whale that is the Ipswich Labour party headed by Councillor Ellesmere should hold their head in shame. Both Cllr Ellesmere and Cllr Ross try to pretend at full council and other meetings, on social media, in fact every opportunity that mocking me or my colleagues is fair game.
Well it is, as long as they are told that it says more about them than it ever will about me! Their behaviour at the last meeting was atrocious with mickey taking, disingenuous remarks and blatant rudeness. But it confirmed to me that it was because we as a group put in a fine united performance and our questions to the portfolio holders left them flustered and hesitant.
They underestimated me last year when they thought they could take my seat from me and they also underestimated me as leader of the group. They have been proved wrong on both counts. And it is that underestimation that is going to see them more than anxious as we approach the big day.
Ben Gummer is very popular and loved by many - the residents know his achievements and now we need to shout it out from every corner. That's my main role over the next 2 months.
Comparing Ellesmere to Ben Gummer in terms of leadership and a deserving MP role is like comparing a Least Weasel to a Thoroughbred Horse...
In case you fancied seeing it for yourself - take a look at the recording by Ipswich spy of the full council here